One of the Democrats’ Budding Stars (otherwise known as the “BS-ers”)
has revealed to us something that not one farmer had ever mentioned on national TV: Cows fart! Golly!
Of course, this particular BS-er did not have anything to say about rabbits, skunks, babies, or
old people giving off gaseous emissions! But leave that particular dilemma
aside for a moment. Cow farts are the
problem-of-the-hour.
I particularly want everyone to note what this particular
BS-er advised us all to do: Give up eating meat. Yes, Sir! An immediate end to
this flatulence problem would occur with the demise of the many thousands of
methane-contributing cows. Of course, just HOW we are going to get rid of “the
cattle on a thousand hills” – who, according to the Psalmist, all belong to the
Lord God – is something that has not been decided on. Maybe we could ship them
to Mars or Venus. Maybe we could launch them all into space (a sort of
permanent deep-freeze). At the very least, we could dump every single last one
of them into the volcanoes that are erupting around the “Pacific Ring of Fire.”
The smell of burning carcasses would only last a year or two!
But the cattle situation COULD be set to one side if we
could just build trains across the ocean! Then we wouldn’t have to fly to move
people and things around the globe. We could just…take the train! Hmmm….I think
I missed something in physics class all those many years ago! (Maybe we could
start a “Saint Peter on the Water” International Company!)
The only thing I want to ask this particular BS-er is this:
If Superman and Supergirl are allowed to fly, why can’t we ordinary mortals be
permitted to do the same?
“That’s just fantasy,” one of the BS-ers will no doubt say.
Right…never thought of that. Flatulence and fantasy – I’m
supposed to take these thing seriously?
You’re joking – right?
